You Know I Am Just Going to Do It Again.

"He who deliberates fully before taking a step will spend his entire life on one leg." ~Chinese Proverb

Here'southward the thing: I don't know what to do.

Well-nigh this thing, nearly that thing. Almost large things and small things.

About anything.

Actually, to be honest, even the smallest affair seems big when I don't know what to practice virtually information technology. The land of "not knowing what to do" is similar some kind of Phenomenon Grow for small things in my heed.

This is not a new thing. Not knowing what to practice is a particular and well-honed talent of mine. I can fifty-fifty juggle several not knowing what-to-dos at once.

For example, at the moment I don't know whether to become away with my friends this weekend or not. And if I do volition I take the train? Or get a lift?

I don't know whether to accept that new task. And if I do, when should I start it? What about all those other job offers that will alluvion through the door the minute I say yes to this one?

I don't know whether to get-go the nutrition tomorrow. Or today. Or next week. Or not at all. I don't know whether to phone call my counselor or ride this one out alone.

I don't know what is best, what is right. I don't know what I want to exercise.

Practise yous know what else I don't know? I don't know what to do about not knowing what to do.

And whenever I feel like this (which is not ever, merely often), I beginning non knowing what to do about things I did know what to do about before. Things I had already made decisions on, things I felt excited and sure about before, at present experience wobbly and wrong. Fifty-fifty though I know the decisions felt right when I fabricated them.

My brain starts questioning it all: What if I didn't really know what to practise and so either, and only decided on something that wasn't really the right matter to do after all? What if it turns out to be "wrong"? What if I acted on impulse and didn't think it all through properly?

It's like I'm mourning all the other possible options that will never, ever happen now because I didn't choose them.

The trivial vox in my head chides me: If yous choose selection a, then such and such might happen, which could lead to ten then that may mean y. Had I known in the beginning about y, maybe I wouldn't take called that original affair. Or would I? How do I know?

And this uncertainty, the worry, the anxiety, the not knowing, information technology isn't picky. It doesn't merely stick to the matter I'm not sure about. Information technology leaks. It seeps into everything else, so instead of feeling uncertain or anxious about i thing in particular, about one decision specifically, I feel anxious, uncertain, and worried full stop. I forget what started it. I just feel information technology.

I feel it in my chest, well-nigh my heart. In my pharynx. It feels similar guilt, muddled with regret, with overtones of panic and an undercurrent of fright. It feels hard and common cold, like a vice-similar grip.

And I don't like it. But I but don't know what to do nearly information technology. And so I do nothing. Except worry and be anxious that doing zippo is non the right thing to practice. It's exhausting, information technology's frustrating, and it'southward totally and utterly unproductive.

And the only thing that makes it cease? Is to only determine and do something. To merely do anything.

And the only mode to know what to practice? Well really, there is no answer to that i.

Other than to non worry well-nigh worrying. To not experience anxious about feeling anxious. To accept that there is no right answer.

To exhale. To attempt to experience across the worry, to try to feel the answer rather than (over) think information technology.

To stop trying to second-guess every possible outcome of every possible determination. To terminate trying to command and account for every accountability. It just isn't possible.

To trust.

I can't know what will happen. I can't know how I will feel about any of it. I can't know whether the decision I make is any better or worse than any other conclusion I could take fabricated because I am just ever going to feel the 1 path I do choose.

So I tin only react with what I have, what I know, and how I feel, right here and right now. And I don't demand to know how to exercise that; I merely demand to exercise it. I simply need to let it to happen.

Back to my decisions. Well, I all the same don't know what to exercise. I even so don't know what the "right" thing is.

But perhaps that's not so much of a problem later all.

Because I do know what the wrong thing is. And that's to make no determination at all. Fifty-fifty if the decision I brand is not to decide just nonetheless—that is still a determination. Own it.

A friend once said to me, "Whenever the time is right, information technology will be the right time." Information technology helps me relax about my decisions.

I oftentimes wonder: Am I the only i like this? I don't know that either, simply if y'all're with me:

Stop thinking it through. Terminate making upward what might happen. Considering that's what'south happening here, you lot're merely making it up. Just make the decision instead and savour the ride. Whatever information technology turns out to be, it doesn't really matter—you tin can modify it subsequently if you really have to.

Any the decision is, but make information technology. What's the worst that can happen, really?

Just make the decision and then exist glad you did. Bask the liberty and the relief that follows.

Enjoy the nowadays, indecision costless. Because while you're busy worrying about what might happen tomorrow, guess what? Y'all're missing out on all the swell stuff happening today.

So merely decide. But relax.

Want to know the skilful news? The determination thing is but as leaky as the indecision thing.

In one case I get going again, I know there'll be no stopping me. I'll cakewalk through decisions that floored me before. I'll put those small-scale things back in their place. And if it feels incorrect, I'll change it. I won't worry about information technology. Things that felt a scrap wrong and weird earlier simply won't thing anymore.

I won't know where this whole confident, decision making thing came from. I'll just feel it.

I'll experience it in my chest, about my center. It will feel like contentment, embracing joy, tickled with peace and flavored with lightness. It will feel soft and warm, like molten honey trickling through my veins. It will make me smiling.

And I will love it. And I volition do all I tin can to agree on to it.

That I do know.

And then let'due south just get started. Let'due south just relax. Allow'due south just determine. And let's never look back.

Photo by J. Tegnerud

About Emma While

Emma is passionate about positive psychology, avidly learning and applying its lessons to her life and work. Her own personal journey through stress, growth and discovery inform both her ChattingHappy blog  and The Happy Catalyst facebook page with the hope of spreading happiness to others, one spark at a time.

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Source: https://tinybuddha.com/blog/what-to-do-when-you-dont-know-what-to-do/